He tells some wonderfully observed and equally funny stories of life as a school inspector, and the characters he has come across during his time as an inspector.
Let me just give you one of his tales. He is visiting a Catholic Infants school in York, where the head teacher is an Irish Nun. She is berating Gervaise due to the fact that nowadays one has to more than watch what one does where children are concerned. She tells him that each day before the local races all the infants were taken to York race course to sample the atmospehre of the races. One particular year as all the children have finished their picnic one little boy is jumping up and down and holding himself in the only way an infant can when he is desperate to go to the toilet. Sister asks him what is the matter, and he tells her he is desparate to go to the toilet, so rather than take twenty odd boys one at a time she lines them all up and marches them to the nearby portaloo, leaving another member of staff to look after the girls in her absence.
The first desparate little boy enters the loo, and after a short time comes out, still clutching himself. The good sister asks whatever is the matter and he explains that the loos are the kind you have to stand up to and they are too high, so she takes him in, drops his underpants and trousers and holds him up, after carefully directing him towards the urinal. She shakes him when he has finished, and then pulls up his underpants and trousers and tells him to go wash his hands.
She does this for all the remainder of the boys, and notices that the last boys is particularly well endowed. She is about to lift him up when she realises that she doesn’t recognise the last boy and comments on the fact. “No!” says an embarrased voice, “I’m the jockey riding Red Rum in the 3.30 tomorrow!”
The first desparate little boy enters the loo, and after a short time comes out, still clutching himself. The good sister asks whatever is the matter and he explains that the loos are the kind you have to stand up to and they are too high, so she takes him in, drops his underpants and trousers and holds him up, after carefully directing him towards the urinal. She shakes him when he has finished, and then pulls up his underpants and trousers and tells him to go wash his hands.
She does this for all the remainder of the boys, and notices that the last boys is particularly well endowed. She is about to lift him up when she realises that she doesn’t recognise the last boy and comments on the fact. “No!” says an embarrased voice, “I’m the jockey riding Red Rum in the 3.30 tomorrow!”
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