"The Naked Man" & Austwick

Its half term this week and being the boring old wrinklies that we are we have taken Mollie and Tom (Olivia is up in Scotland with her other grandparents) to……..

You’ll never guess where …….

The Naked Man Café in Settle, then for a walk down to the stream and Flascoe Bridge, and then followed by a meal at the Gamecock in Austwick! Of course Ruby our chocolate Labrador joined us, and she is certainly three sizes smaller, after her running up and down the beaches and swimming in the sea on both Arran and at Bamburgh, and Low Newton by the Sea whilst we were on holiday.

Oh! - talking of dogs, a new beast has joined the herd. Whilst we were away on holiday Hannah had a surprise birthday present from Ben, in the shape of a Miniature Pincher called Pixie.

Mollie with Hannah's Miniature Pincher (Pixie)

The Naked Man Cafe in Settle,with Tom, Dot & Mollie heading for the door.

If you’re beginning to get a sense of Déjà vu about visiting Austwick, that’s because we did exactly the same on both the 13th and the 19th August [See Blogs titles “Fun with Mollie, Tom & Ruby at Austwick” and “One Dog + Three Grandchildren + A Stream = WET, WET, WET”]

Tom demolishing a Gingerbread Man

Mollie in pensive mood.

A country lane in Austwick

Mollie & Ruby, showing just how fit they are!

Daredevils at the stream

Swing High, Swing Low.......

45's LP's and Record Players

I am an avid collector of recorded music and films.

You can discern how long I have been collecting recorded music by the fact that I still retain one hundred and fifty two 7” 45 rpm records in my record collection!

I first started collecting recorded music during the time when 10” & 12” 78 rpm records were still being sold. (Those that broke quite easily unless you were very careful with the way you handled them!)

Sadly I no longer possess any of those old records – not because they were all smashed, but because when the new sound technology came in (electrically driven and amplified record players – as opposed to the old wind up gramophone) most of the machines gradually phased out the ability to rotate a turntable at 78 rpm (revolution per minute to the uninitiated) so it became impossible to play the old records at the correct speed!

One of the earliest and cheapest models of record player was the Dansette, which was a single record player produced by Birmingham Sound Reproducers (BSR)





Eventually the Auto Changer came on to the market. This device enabled you to pile up about 6 records above the turntable and as one record ended and the pick up arm swung off the record, the next record would drop down on to the turntable ready to be played.

My first record player was a Bush with a Garrard turntable. It was my pride and joy, and was a bit more sophisticated than the original Dansettes of the period in that it had a speed selector for no less than FOUR speeds – 16 and 2/3, 33, 45, 78! The slower speed of 16 and 2/3 was for recordings of the spoken word, which didn’t require as wide a frequency range reproduction as music.

Looking back to the late 50’s/early 60’s I remember that one of my teenage heroes was a singer called Lonnie Donegan. Lonnie used to play guitar and banjo with the likes of Chris Barber’s Jazz Band, and eventually formed his own band which was known as the Lonnie Donegan Skiffle Group.

If you haven’t heard of Lonnie Donegan, or forgotten who he was read on…..

Lonnie Donegan MBE (29 April 1931 – 3 November 2002) was a skiffle musician, with more than 20 UK Top 30 hits to his name. He was known as the "King of Skiffle" and is often cited as a large influence on the generation of British musicians who became famous in the 1960s. The Guinness Book of British Hit Singles & Albums states Donegan was "Britain's most successful and influential recording artist before The Beatles. He chalked up 24 successive Top 30 hits, and was the first UK male to score two U.S. Top 10s"

more in the next blog........

The State of the NHS

A friend, (who has nothing to do with the NHS) sent me a piece called "The State of the NHS." I share it with you because I think it very succinctly and in a humourous way points out many of the problems, not only with the NHS but also many other state run systems.



THE STATE OF THE NHS

Once upon a time it was resolved to have a boat race between a BUPA team and a team representing the N.H.S. Both teams practised long and hard to reach their peak performance. On the big day they were as ready as they could be.

The BUPA team won by a mile.

Afterwards the N.H.S. team became very discouraged by the result and morale sagged. Senior management decided that the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found, and a working party was set up to investigate the problem and recommend appropriate action.

Their conclusion was that the BUPA team had eight people rowing and one person steering, whereas the N.H.S. team had eight people steering and one person rowing.

Senior management immediately hired a consultancy company to do a study on the team's structure. Thousands of pounds and several months later they concluded that: "Too many people were steering and not enough rowing."

To prevent losing to BUPA the next year, the team structure was changed to three "Assistant Steering Managers", three "Steering Managers", one "Executive Steering Manager" and a "Director of Steering Services". A performance and appraisal system was set up to give the person rowing the boat more incentive to work harder.

The next year BUPA won by two miles.

Following this, the N.H.S. laid off the rower for poor performance, sold off all the paddles, cancelled all capital investment in new equipment, and halted development of a new canoe. The money saved was used to fund higher than average pay awards to senior management.



Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water.
Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.

Both subsequently died in the ambulance and the PCT set up an enquiry, which came to the following conclusions:

1. The 50 mile journey to the nearest casualty department was in the couples' best interests.

2. The fact that there was no local bed in which Jack could mend his head was unfortunate but no targets had been breached and he had been offered a choice.

3. The lack of vinegar and brown paper was not material to the man's death as NICE had not yet decided whether it was cost-effective and in any case both the brown paper nurse and the vinegar nurse were away on courses.

4. The GP was most to blame and should be suspended and referred to the GMC as he had:

a. Not reported Jack and Jill's lack of water to social services;

b. Failed to recognise that anyone going UP the hill to fetch a pail of water must be seriously demented;

c. Had not involved the Falls Coordinator which resulted in Jill tumbling after Jack.




Dr Foster went to Gloucester in a shower of rain He stepped in a puddle right up to his middle and never went there again.

This also resulted in major public debate.

The Press said it was outrageous that - given the fact that doctors were paid around half a million pounds for a 30 hour week - Dr. Foster should be put off by a mere soaking.

The politicians wanted to know why any doctors were going to Gloucester in the first place as it was an over-doctored middle class area unlikely to vote Labour at the next election.

The RCN said doctors weren't needed as nurses could do their job just as well, they were holistically trained and would have no problem with puddles as they could also walk on water.

The local nurse practitioners agreed that they would of course go to Gloucester after doing the appropriate course.

The Social workers said that no one had considered how the puddle might feel about being trodden into.

The managers decided to do a piece of work around rain and puddles.

The next time there was a problem in Gloucester it coincided with a large multidisciplinary stake holder conference and no one was available so NHS Direct advised calling the GP.


Whilst it makes you smile isn't it symptomatic of lots of today's problems??

Sad isn't it?

BNP Shown For What It Is

I wouldn’t describe myself as a “Political Animal” – in fact I would go so far as to say that politics is a (sadly) necessary evil of life, however I was tempted to watch Question Time last night, just to see how Nick Griffin fared.

It had been widely publicised that he would be a member of the panel, and there had been threats of demonstrations outside Television Centre, and at other strategic places.

David Dimbleby was in the chair,

and the panel consisted of Chris Huhne (Lib Dem - Eastleigh),

Baroness Warsi (Conservative – Dewsbury),

Jack Straw (Labour),


Nick Griffin (BNP)

and the playwright and Deputy Chairman of the British Museum’s Board of Trustees Bonnie Greer.

The first questioner asked “Is it fair that the BNP has hijacked Churchill?” and Jack Straw was the first to respond, with a very definite “It is not fair”

He went on to state that the BNP was founded on race, which distinguishes it from every other political party, and “that we only won the First & Second World Wars because we were joined in those wars by millions of black and Asian people from around the world.”

Every other panel member took their turn to attack the thoughts and beliefs of Nick Griffin.

The final question directed at Nick Griffin was “Might this programme be viewed as an early Christmas present for the BNP?”

My own perception was that the programme did nothing to support Nick Griffin at all, but merely showed him to be the odious toad he really is.

Nobody in the Private Sector Would Get Away With Such a Performance!

I wonder just how much more can this present government get away with. If there was a prize for gross in efficiency I am sure that the Home Office would walk away with the first prize, and with first class honours!

How can this organisation lose up to 40,000 (yes FORTY THOUSAND) immigrants?

These are immigrants who should have left this country up to six years ago but could still be in Britain.

In a letter to MPs, it was revealed there was "no formal record" of the people, who were refused permission to stay or whose visas had run out.

The UK Border Agency has begun looking at case files to see if the migrants are still in the UK and can be removed.

These will be checked against police records to see if any are "harmful".

It follows previous rows about the failure to remove foreign prisoners and the backlog of asylum cases.

Immigration Officer checking files

Agency chief executive Lin Homer said most of the files were from before 2003. In a letter to the Commons home affairs committee, she said: "In the last few months we have begun the process of reviewing these files to consider if any further action is necessary or possible.
"Where further action is required it will be taken and any cases which may be considered as harmful to the public will be prioritised."

Shadow home secretary Chris Grayling said: "This looks suspiciously as if the Home Office is trying to get rid of its problem cases by quietly abandoning them in the hope that no one is looking. "This is a government which has completely mismanaged our immigration system, and now seems to be giving up trying to do anything about the difficulties it has created."


Liberal Democrat home affairs spokesman Chris Huhne said: "Since Labour and the Tories abolished exit checks, it has been impossible to know whether visitors left the country when they should have done. "It is hardly surprising, therefore, that there are these 40,000 people unaccounted for."

Sir Andrew Green, chairman of Migrationwatch UK, said it was "yet another skeleton in the Home Office cupboard". He added: "Tens of thousands of case files are lying around and the true situation has been covered up for years on end. This is symptomatic of the utter chaos in the asylum and immigration system during the past 10 years.

"Nobody in the private sector would get away with such a performance."

Button - World Champion

I managed to catch the highlights of the Brazilian Grand Prix at Interlagos yesterday, and was pleased to see that Jenson Button has finally come good and achieved the Crown of World Champion. I think many of his supporters would have liked to have seen him fly past the post in pole position, but by finishing in fifth place he has clinched his position as World Champion.

The race was pretty exciting, with more than the odd spin off in the first lap. Trulli didn’t seem too pleased with Sunil when they both climbed out of their respective cars!

It was on 25 05 09 that I wrote about Button under the heading of “Button – Next World Champion?” and gave a brief resume of his career to date.

Button is the second consecutive British World Champion, following last years win by Lewis Hamilton. At least we seem to have got it right in Formula One!!

Well done to Brawn on winning the Constructors Championship. Not a bad achievement in their 10 months existence!

What A Sad, Sordid & Crazy World We Live In

What a sad, sordid and crazy world we live in. A world where many (not me I hasten to add!) hero worship society’s misfits, junkies and deviant sexual personalities.

Let’s just take a run through some of the latest “personalities” who spring to mind – having been in the news recently.

Jade Goody, who was married to what can only be termed a junkie, Jack Tweed, and who is at present accused of raping a teenage girl.

Amy Winehouse, a known drug addict, who divorced her husband Blake Civil-Fielder, who is a known junkie and drug dealer.

Matt Lucas (of Little Britain fame) whose ex “partner” Kevin McGee committed suicide, and left a message on Facebook which stated: “Kevin McGee thinks that death is much better than life”.

Michael Jackson, who died of a drug overdose, and had been hauled before the courts because of his strange beliefs about sleeping with children – although he was later acquitted.

Katie Price (aka Jordan) who after her acrimonious split with Peter Andre has taken up with cage fighter and former Hollyoaks actor Alex Reid. (Who, according to one tabloid is a cross dresser and has dated Ladyboys in Thailand.)

And now – Stephen Gately. Once again the mass hysteria hits the headlines. I appreciate that it is sad when anyone dies, but when I read some of the “over the top” comments it really makes my blood boil.

This man was a human being NOT A SAINT.

On Friday Jan Moir wrote an article in the Daily Mail in which she stated:

"Healthy and fit 33-year-old men do not just climb into their pyjamas and go to sleep on the sofa, never to wake up again. Whatever the cause of death is, it is not, by any yardstick, a natural one."

"For once again, under the carapace of glittering, hedonistic celebrity, the ooze of a very different and more dangerous lifestyle has seeped out for all to see."


Gately was found dead in a Majorca apartment last weekend. Post mortem examination results show he died from pulmonary oedema, or a build-up of fluid in the lungs.

Jan has been lambasted by the members of the “Pink Fraternity” for her comments.

Why?

My wife, who is a nurse, had previously predicted that Stephen Gately would have died of fluid in the lungs, as a result of inhaling his own vomit.

As I said at the start of this article - What a sad, sordid and crazy world we live in.

Gavin Maxwell & Ring of Bright Water

This morning I spent half an hour listening to a programme on Radio Four in which Terry Nutkins described his early life with the author and naturalist Gavin Maxwell.

You may remember that Terry Nutkins was the naturalist who featured in such programmes as Animal Magic, The Really Wild Show, Growing Up Wild, (A Sunday morning nature programme which had a 2 million plus audience), Pets Win Prizes, & Brilliant Creatures.

For those of you who may not be familiar with the name Gavin Maxwell, let me tell you a little bit about him……

Gavin Maxwell was born on the 15th July 1914 and died on the 7th September 1969. He was a Scottish naturalist and author, best known for his work with otters. He wrote the book Ring of Bright Water in 1960 and it is about how he brought an otter back from Iraq and raised it in Scotland. Ring of Bright Water sold more than a million copies and was made into a movie starring Bill Travers and Virginia McKenna in 1969.

He was the youngest son of Lieutenant-Colonel Aymer Maxwell and Lady Mary Percy, fifth daughter of the seventh Duke of Northumberland. His grandfather, Sir Herbert Maxwell, was an archaeologist, politician and natural historian].
He was raised in the tiny village of Elrig, near Port William, in Wigtownshire, near the south west corner of Scotland, and Maxwell's relatives still reside in the Port William area; the family's ancient estate and grounds are in nearby Monreith.

In World War II Maxwell served as an instructor with the Special Operations Executive.
After the war, he purchased the Isle of Soay off Skye. He tried to establish a basking shark fishery there between 1945-48. He was unsuccessful, due to bad planning and lack of finance, according to his book Harpoon at a Venture (1952.)

In 1956 Maxwell toured the reed marshes of Southern Iraq with explorer Wilfred Thesiger. Maxwell's account of their trip appears in A Reed Shaken By The Wind.. It was hailed by the New York Times as "near perfect".

Maxwell next moved to Sandaig (which he called Camusfeàrna in his books), a small community opposite Eilean Iarmain on a remote part of the Scottish mainland (in the Glenelg area). There his "otter books" are set. After Ring of Bright Water (1960), he wrote The Rocks Remain (1963), in which the otters Edal, Teko, Mossy, and Monday show great differences in personality.

The Rocks Remain is a sequel to Ring of Bright Water, as it demonstrates the difficulty Maxwell was having, possibly as a result of his mental state, in remaining focused on one project and the impact that had on his otters, Sandaig, and his own life.

After his Sandaig home was destroyed by fire in 1968, Maxwell moved to the lighthouse cottage of Eilean Bàn (White Island), an island he owned off the coast of the Isle of Skye.

In 1969, Maxwell invited John Lister-Kaye to move to Eilean Bàn to help him work on a book about British wild mammals and to assist in building a zoo on the island. Lister-Kaye accepted the invitation and moved to the island, but both projects had to be abandoned when Maxwell died from cancer later that same year.

Eilean Bàn now supports a pier of the 1990s-built Skye Bridge, and, despite modern traffic a hundred feet or so above, the island is a commemorative otter sanctuary. Also on the island is a museum dedicated to Maxwell.

Do make the effort to get hold of a copy of Ring of Bright Water. You will find it a most entertaining and diverting book.

Technological Skills vs Social Skills

A point to ponder…….

Are today’s children becoming so technologically skilled that they are losing their social skills?




I have been reading an article by Jayne Dowle, one of the Yorkshire Post correspondents in which she is worried by the fact that so many children seem to live the vast part of their lives “on line.”

A new survey by the online charity YouthNet has discovered that as many as 75% of 16 – 24 years olds said they couldn’t live their lives without the internet. Jayne sites the example of her four years old daughter, who on coming home from school “stakes her claim on the laptop.”

Our own grandchildren seem to do very much the same.

The report from this survey goes on to call these children “Digital Natives”; under the age of twenty five and surrounded since toddlerhood by computers, the internet, mobile phones and video games. True, you can’t stop the technological advances, but isn’t there also a warning being sounded here? So many children think they are safe when they are on the internet - “as long as you know what you’re doing.” - but do they really know what they are doing, when so many of them consider that the internet can solve any of their problems quicker and better than a real human being?

What is happening to their social skills? How can they interact with real people?

Holidays, What Holidays?

I had hoped that things would have calmed down a little after having spent a most relaxing fortnight on holiday, but it seems that my hopes are not to be fulfilled.

Let me fill you in on the events since we returned home.....

As usual, after a fortnight's holiday there is usually a huge pile of clothing requiring washing. Having arrived home on Saturday evening, my wife decided to leave the start of the washing until Sunday morning (whilst I was at church playing the organ for the morning service). When I arrived home from church I was greeted by a rather perplexed wife, who informed me that the washing maching was "Refusing to spin."

It being Sunday there was no way I was going to be successful in getting a service engineer to attend! So first thing Monday morning I was on the phone to the washer insurance company requesting a service engineer, but all I managed to get was a "Press one if you require...." "Press two if you want...." The fourth option was the one I needed, but I then had to give the insurance policy number, the make of the washer, the model number, and the postcode of our address. Then a pleasant recorded voice informed me that "I am now putting you through to the required number." After two rings, and a lengthy purring the phone went dead. Three more attempts through all the preceding rigmarole achieved just the same results!

On my next attempt I did manage to raise a human being (as opposed to a recorded voice), and once again I had to give all the information I had now given four times (at least I was word perfect by this time!) and eventually I spoke to a lady who could tell me that a service engineer would be with me on Tuesday, but couldn't specify if it would be morning or afternoon! So I then had to cancel my playing the piano for the Nursery children at the local Primary School.

At least, true to the information I had been given, a service engineer did arrive on Tuesday and a new motor had to be fitted. Now the washing could commence!

I should have been doing my voluntary work at Tourist Information on Wednesday, but I was told on Sunday that my services were required to play for a large funeral on Wednesday afternoon. When I arrived at Church all the parking spaces were coned off. It was the funeral of a local Police Constable and it looked as if all the West Yorkshire force was in attendance. There was a guard of honour three deep, and six policemen carried the coffin into church.

My Thursday choir practice didn't take place due to the hymns not arriving until too late for the practice!

Friday we had to do a big shop for my mum in law, and we took her for a little run out to Bolton Abbey to see the colours of the autumnal trees.

Saturday morning I had a Wedding Preparation Day to attend, where I spoke to the couples intending to get married about the choice of music for their wedding, the choice of hymns etc.

Then it was round to Sunday again (where did the week go?) and playing for services again.

Monday evening I had a practice with my Male Voice Choir - we have a combined concert with a Ladies Choir coming up on Saturday 31st October, as well as two Christmas concerts - so I also had to make a start on the music for our Christmas programmes.

Yesterday (Tuesday) I was playing for a Toddler's Praise Service, which is normally held in church, but due to decorators working in the church I had to play for the Toddlers in the church hall. It wasn't the easiest of things to do when the children are in one room and I am sat at the piano in an adjoining room!! This was followed by two sessions playing for the Nursery children at a local Primary School. For the second session we finished up in the library as the hall was in use for an assembly. At least there was a piano in the library!! This was followed by a visit to Ikea to pick up a set of drawers for our youngest daughter.

I suppose next week can only get better (or am I tempting fate?)

Now when are the next holidays???

An Honest MP with a Sense of Humour

Alistair Carmichael - Liberal Democrat MP for the Orkneys and Shetland Islands

Just a quick comment today…….

I see that the question of MP’s expenses is in the news again. It is rumoured that up to 300 MP’s will be receiving a letter from Sir Thomas Legg, asking them to either re pay, or furnish further details of their expenses claims.

It seems that at long last someone in power is getting real at long last – or maybe……

I have learnt from an impeccable source (Barry White – he of the WHITE STUFF Blog) that Alistair Carmichael (Liberal Democrat MP for Orkney & Shetland) has already fallen foul of the new, tighter regulations on travel claims.

It seems that in its wisdom someone in power has decided that MP’s should travel by train and not aircraft, so on the new claim form it clearly requests that you insert the name of the nearest main line station. Now Alistair, not wanting to fall foul of the new regulations rang the Houses of Commons Fees Office and explained that as he resided in what is essentially the middle of the North Sea, surely he didn’t need to fill in his nearest main line station.

The official he spoke to was one of those people obviously couldn’t or wouldn’t think for himself, and insisted that Alistair fill in the required mainline station.

God Bless him. Alistair did his homework.

His nearest mainline station?

Oslo!

Holy Island and Berwick upon Tweed

On Friday we spent time doing some last minute shopping for presents. We visited Holy Island, which has been a favourite spot of ours for the last thirty five years.

We first visited Holy Island when my best friend from Teacher Training days, Dave, invited Dot and myself to stay with him and his wife Sheila. One day he said he would take us somewhere where he was sure we had not been before, but he was sure we would like the place. It turned out to be Holy Island. We have visited it ever since and stayed at more or less all times of the year.

Our two eldest daughters have spent many happy hours playing on the beaches of Holy Island and Bamburgh. Our youngest daughter took her first unaided steps outside the Post Office on Holy Island.

I have played the organ at the Parish Church of St Mary the Virgin for two previous Vicars, Revd Dennis Bill and Revd David Adam

Altar Table and Reredos of St Mary the Virgin HolyIsland

Sanctuary Carpet - a replica of a page from the Lindisfarne Gospels

St Mary the Virgin Parish Church and the Priory from the Heugh

Indeed a strange coincidence is that last year when we first stayed at Waren Mill, our next door but one neighbour was David Adam who has now retired, but is still active in writing books on Celtic Prayers and Celtic Christianity.

I have taken parties from St Michael & All Angels Cottingley on pilgrimages to Holy Island, and made the acquaintance of Dr Kate Tristram a scholar on Celtic Christianity. She has addressed our pilgrimages on more than one occasion, usually telling us of her researches and studies before they have been published!

So what can I say about Holy Island? It’s not a picture box pretty place. In late autumn and winter the cold north eastern winds can sweep across it and make it feel like Siberia, but it is a place of almost mystical beauty. It’s not a tangible beauty you can capture on film, but rather an atmosphere, an ethereal feeling, a hypnotic sense of peace and calm.

I’ve no intention of going into the history of the island - suffice it to say that it was the Cradle of Christianity in the Golden Age of Northumbria.

St Aidan

and St Oswald and St Cuthbert are three of the saints inextricably connected with Holy Island, or Lindisfarne, to give it its other name. The Lindisfarne Gospels were produced here,

Replica of a page of the Lindisfarne Gospels in the the Peter Chapel

and they now reside in the British Museum.

If you are a bird watcher you can see many examples of native British birds as well as examples of birds which pass through from northern climes.

If you enjoy peace and serenity, history, Castles,

Priories,

Celtic History, Christian History, bird watching, walks, wild flowers, wonderful sunsets etc.

then Holy Island is for you!

We called at The Barn at Beal for lunch. This is an example of a local farmer diversifying. What was his old cow shed is now a café overlooking Holy Island.

The Barn at Beal


The Barn at Beal (interior)

The food is drawn from local sources and much of it home baked. The welcome by the Maitre D is warm and welcoming. If you are in the area do call in. You will not be disappointed by the food or the views! There is also a Birds of Prey Centre.

We then spent some time having a final walk around Berwick,

The Old (road) Bridge

The Tweed (road) Bridge

The Royal Border (railway) Bridge


The Elizabethan Town Walls




Love Lane, leading to Bridge Street




Bridge Street




Old Customs House on the Quay Walls



The top of Marygate

Looking down Marygate to the Town Hall

Sandgate & Hide Hill


Aerial View of Berwick looking southwards and showing the Elizabethan Walls


We returned to Holy Island to the Crown and Anchor for an evening meal.

The Crown & Anchor on Holy Island

The Crown & Anchor - the Bar

The following morning we had to return home, after a very relaxing and enjoyable holiday!