A couple of blogs previously I mentioned that I was looking forward to a particularly busy time during December. I had somehwere in the region of sixreen appearences to make at church for various services, carol services, choir practices etc. Then there were three dates as Santa, plus two or three dates when I was speaking to various groups and organisations.
One of the groups I spoke to was the local retired businessmens group, known as the Janus Club. They informed me that it was their Ladies event, when they invited their wives along, and concluded the proceedings with a Christmas Lunch. As I was speaking I was asked if Dot would also come along and we were invited to join them for their Christmas Lunch.
What I didn't mention in previous blogs was that I had been persuaded to go on a diet. "What a wonderful time to start a diet," I hear you say! Well with the exception of the aforementioned Christmas Lunch I have stuck to it like superglue, and the result was that 6 weeks after I commenced it I went to pay a return visit to the dietitian and was delighted to be informed that I had shed one and a half stones!
Dot has booked a trip to the local Aagrah Curry House on Saturday for my birthday treat, and Sarah has invited me for a meal at the Busfield Arms on Sunday (another celebration of my birthday), then there is the Christmas lunch on Dec 25th., with Hannah cooking the Turkey and Potatoes and briging them up to our house, so I am really going to have to watch the food intake!
Well, here we are on December 21st. and I have more or less managed to get through it all unscathed! Well, not quite - my wife insisted that I pay a visit to the local hairdressers so that "You will at least look repectable." I haven't yet worked out how having a hair cut and a beard trim can do that, but to keep the peace I visited the said hairdressers.
Whilst I was in Bingley I paid a visit to two of the local charity shops (which I hadn't been in for some time) and, simple soul that I am, I celebrated the loss of weight by purchasing eleven dvd's and a cd. The sum total for all this lot was £1.20 believe it or not!
I've already watched one of the dvd's - Slum Dog Millionaire, a very entertaining story of a poor boy who manages to get on the Indian version of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" and finishes up winning 50,000,000 rupees.
Oh! We have three temporary residents with us over the Christmas period. Hannah had brought the school rabbits home and they have taken up residence in our garage (in a new hutch - I hasten to add). Ruby is busy doing her motherly bit and paying regular calls on them to see that they are settled in and happy!
So just a couple of birthday meals, a Crib Service, A Midnight Mass and a Christmas Morning Service, then it will be a couple of nights relaxing at the King's Head in Masham!
Friday 21 December 2012
Sunday 9 December 2012
Fame at last! (Well Almost!)
I was taken by my youngest daughter to the Christmas Show of Gervase Phinn. He was appearing in Darwen, so it was something of a novelty to be chauffeur driven. Never having been to the library theatre before, we set off in plenty of time so we could find the place. It turned out quite easy to find, being well signposted once you entered Darwen, so it was, that we were in the theatre foyer killing time, when Gervase Phinn appeared, mingling with the people who would make up his audience.
He eventually came over to Hannah and I and during the course of conversation he asked us what we did. I told him I was a retired head teacher and Hannah was a teacher. In his introductory patter about parents supporting children and helping them decide the course of their working life he made mention of the fact that there was a retired teacher in the audience who had encouraged his daughter to go into teaching!
Those of you un-familiar with Gervase Phinn may like to know that he is billed as the James Herriot of the education world, and he really is just as funny, with his tales being firmly rooted in school life.
One of the pieces he does is about what droll and strange names some children have to suffer these days. He mentions a boy in his class called Duane, and eventually tells you his surname was Pipe [Duane Pipe - Drain Pipe] He then goes on to tell you about a boy in a Catholic school who had been Christened Innocent. When he asked the head teacher of the school how came to have such an unusual name, and how embarrassed he must be with it, the head responds with the fact that he was named after the pope, but unfortunately his family surname causes even more embarrassment. It is Bystander [Innocent Bystander!]
The real "gem of the night" was the story about the infants teacher who takes all her class to York Race course. Soon one of the children requests to go to the toilet, and being a teacher wise to the ways of infants, she takes all the boys along to the toilet. The first child goes in to the urinals, and comes out complaining that they are too high for him, so the teacher has to go in. She lines all the boys up and in they troop. One by one she pulls down their trousers and underpants and lifts them up the height of the urinal, carefully shaking them at the end of the time. She picks up the last child and notices that he seems extremely well endowed compared to all the other boys. When she puts him down she realises that he is not one of her boys, and asks who he is.
"Well madam", the boy replies, "I'm Frankie Detorri, and I'm riding in the 3.30!"
He eventually came over to Hannah and I and during the course of conversation he asked us what we did. I told him I was a retired head teacher and Hannah was a teacher. In his introductory patter about parents supporting children and helping them decide the course of their working life he made mention of the fact that there was a retired teacher in the audience who had encouraged his daughter to go into teaching!
Those of you un-familiar with Gervase Phinn may like to know that he is billed as the James Herriot of the education world, and he really is just as funny, with his tales being firmly rooted in school life.
One of the pieces he does is about what droll and strange names some children have to suffer these days. He mentions a boy in his class called Duane, and eventually tells you his surname was Pipe [Duane Pipe - Drain Pipe] He then goes on to tell you about a boy in a Catholic school who had been Christened Innocent. When he asked the head teacher of the school how came to have such an unusual name, and how embarrassed he must be with it, the head responds with the fact that he was named after the pope, but unfortunately his family surname causes even more embarrassment. It is Bystander [Innocent Bystander!]
The real "gem of the night" was the story about the infants teacher who takes all her class to York Race course. Soon one of the children requests to go to the toilet, and being a teacher wise to the ways of infants, she takes all the boys along to the toilet. The first child goes in to the urinals, and comes out complaining that they are too high for him, so the teacher has to go in. She lines all the boys up and in they troop. One by one she pulls down their trousers and underpants and lifts them up the height of the urinal, carefully shaking them at the end of the time. She picks up the last child and notices that he seems extremely well endowed compared to all the other boys. When she puts him down she realises that he is not one of her boys, and asks who he is.
"Well madam", the boy replies, "I'm Frankie Detorri, and I'm riding in the 3.30!"
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